Business Planning Hd Plan Funny Quotes Succession Software For Mac

. Find information technology (IT), computer and Internet humor for your next presentation. According to Andrew Carnegie, 'There's little success where there's little laughter.' That would seem to suggest to us that most presentations are not very successful - and could be vastly improved by the leavening agent of humor. With that in mind we've gathered an assortment of the best IT-related humor we could find. We've got videos, jokes, cartoons, quotations, a PowerPoint section and more to jazz up your presentations and have your audience eating out of your hand. Quotations and Quotables In a presentation, there's no better way to make a point than to say something pithy and amusing.

Business Planning Hd Plan Funny Quotes Succession Software For Mac Free

And there's definitely no easier way to do THAT than to quote something pithy and amusing that someone else has already said! We've searched the Web to find the best pages for entertaining tech-related quotations. 'In a few minutes a computer can make a mistake so great that it would have taken many men many months to equal it.' Here's a collection of. 'Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus.

Computers are from hell.' Has a great selection of computer quotes gathered from the Internet. Do you know what a sniglet is? It's a descriptive term that is not in the dictionary, although perhaps it should be. And now we've got that figured out, do you know what a 'seagull manager' is? (That's the exec that flies in squawking, and dumps all over everything before flying out again). For more snappy (and quotable) definitions, see.

DangerousLogic.com has a nice selection of sniglets in. Want to really dance on the bleeding edge? Try some of the totally prohibited buzzwords from. Need to explain a catastrophe? Resort to one or more of Multimedia Section: The Videos If a picture's worth a thousand words, these moving pics must be extremely valuable.

Watch and judge for yourself!. In Wes Borg's stand-up routine, he portrays an 8-month veteran showing a newbie the ropes. On, see another version of the above, plus 'How to buy a computer,' 'Behind The Scenes @ Microsoft' and more, including A Song: 'Every OS sucks.' . In this instant classic, Weird Al is the Uber-Geek gangsta wannabe. Oh, more Weird Al! ('What kind of chip you got in there - a Dorito?'

). Mark Day takes it upon himself to mount a wide-scale. Computers perform a famous scene from 'When Harry met Sally' in.

How might things be different in a world where. Hear a certain catchy tune in this video,. Help Desk Humor Funny because they're true!. maintains a collection of Tech support humor organized by topic.

is the blog of a sysadmin. He may be sociopathic, but was he born that way or did his job warp him for eternity? Due to the sadistic nature of the BOFL (B.stard Operator From H.LL), this site may be especially funny for anyone who's ever worked a help desk. is another very funny collection of help desk humor. Amy Kucharik ponders the question,. In the interests of fair play, provides a collection of humorous trouble tickets from an inept tech rep for the rest of us to laugh at.

is a tech support Web series. Sometimes all you can do is laugh.

Networking Humor. Q: My network administrator seems distant, and doesn't want to socialize with the other workers.

A: NA are private creatures that interact better on Internet chat rooms and e-mail rather than on a more personal level. Just give your NA some space and he or she might come to you on their own. It may also be that your NA is lonely. If after a year, your NA still doesn't fit in, try hiring another one.

You'll find the above (and similar sage advice) in Douglas Chick's For more Geek fun, see the links on the left-hand side at. is a Web site dedicated to Cisco technology. Check out the featuring unexpectedly knowledgeable celebrities, such as Arnold Schwarzenegger and Paris Hilton. Highly recommended: 'Fabio on IGRP;' 'Alicia Silverstone on Basic ISDN configuration,' 'Jessica Simpson on Open source routers.' .

Is your router harboring a bad, bad secret? See this interesting, informative and crucially important article:. Also from Router God. We found some very interesting IETF Networking Group RFCs. Here's a quote: 'While reading this document, at various points the readers may have the urge to ask questions like, 'does this make sense?'

'is this feasible?' And 'is the author sane?' The readers must have the ability to suppress such questions and read on. Other than this, no specific technical background is required to read this document. In certain cases (present document included), it may be REQUIRED that readers have no specific technical background.' . A good starting place is RFC 1925,.

Word to the wise: No matter how hard you push and no matter what the priority, you can't increase the speed of light. You may have heard of Broadband over Power Line? Why not try (RFC 3251)? It just makes sense! Cautionary Tales Call this the schadenfreude section - these stories may be worse than anything that's ever happened to you and you can bask in delicious, malicious satisfaction in the troubles of others. And if you've done things as bad yourself, well, at least you know you're not alone.

Gather round, children, and hear the tale of the hapless Lotus developer who filled the hard drive on his high-end server with more than a million agent logs, and in less than an hour at that. Read this sad story, and many more in SearchDomino.com's.

Here's a blooper with a message:. There's much, much more. For example, a user's stiletto heel gets tangled up in the cord on her computer's.um. Read about this and other sad tales in. You can go home again, after all!

Still not enough? On the theory that you can never have too much of a good thing, try the main page,.

Jokes How can you identify an extroverted programmer? (He's the one that looks at your shoes when he's talking to you.) Here's our collection of some of the best computer joke sites:. has a great assortment of jokes and funny stories listed by title. (Why was Stonehenge abandoned? It wasn't IBM compatible.).

BSD.org offers an amusing list of, such as the MCI virus, which reminds you every three minutes that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus. David Shay's non-discriminatory Web site, targets programmers, technicians, and engineers - along with just about anyone else you can think of.

Great ice-breakers for presentations and speeches. We're pretty sure you can find a use for at least some of the pages in the, such as the one giving advice on how to use up lots of bandwidth.

has some pretty funny ones and also lets you submit your own. So, two strings walk into a bar. Sara Ford's blog has a nice assortment of. Want to use cuss-words in a presentation, but can't find a socially acceptable way? Try a foreign language! Offers a Swearsaurus, a random generator of insults in 165 languages (Warning - Results may be politically incorrect, also possibly actionable).

Cartoons. naturally needs no introduction to any self-respecting geek. But here he is anyway. is a great resource and a lot of fun to visit for anyone who's ever worked a help desk - or called one. Features include the cartoon, animations, true tales of help desk woe (and archives of all these) as well as a search function to find just the right cartoon for that special topic. Want to catch up on the adventures of 'Helen, Sweetheart of the Internet' or take the 'Densa' quiz to see just how dumb you are? Has links to these, and Other Fun Ways to Kill Time.

chronicles the adventures of a geek being physically transported around the Web via PTP (Personal Transport Protocol). PowerPoint Humor There's humor about PowerPoint, and humor delivered via the popular presentation tool. Either way, though, they make excellent presentation fodder.

ReallyWarped.com offers an entertaining montage of. Jim Placke's Nuclear, Biological, & Chemical Warfare Web site is more entertaining in spots than one might reasonably expect. Check out the - do YOU know someone who's earned this badge?. finds rabbit alone in the office. bring the data center to life, and sometimes that's bad news! The Web comic and book by Diane Alber capture inside jokes and stories for IT pros.

Name and Phrase Generators Are you a few buzzwords short on an overdue report? Want to find a special pet name for your supervisor? These generators can help!. offer a nice selection of generators, including the Star Trek Title Generator, the Apathetic Online Journal Entry Generator, and the Acronym Interaction, Expansion and Extrapolation Engine (AIEEE). Whether you're a Klingon, Ferengi, or Vulcan, here's a site where you can find your.

I'm Rabbit-ear Fairy Eyes! Will help you also create nicknames for yourself and your friends. Choose from 'nice,' 'naughty,' 'rude,' and 'get me kicked out of school.' . Want to convert to paganism, but too busy for a vision quest? Try the to get you started.

This lets you choose from Elven, Hobbit, Ork, Troll & etc. Loads of fun - take it from me, Dolly Muddle-of Mickle-hallow. translates anything into dialects like Hacker, Swedish Chef, Pig Latin and more! Also other fun things like this at. offers handy tools, such as Who Created Linux? SearchOpenSource.com featured a Who Wrote Linux?

Business Planning Hd Plan Funny Quotes Succession Software For Mac Pro

Contest, See some entries, below. Who is Linus Torvalds' secret collaborator? The answer lies beneath the ice. Can a bite on the nose by a penguin be the true source of Linux development?.

This episode in our series of Linux creation myths casts Linus Torvalds in a hobbit-like role. Last but not Least. Here are some sites that don't fit any of our other categories that we just had to share with you anyway. Jack Loftus offers some useful. Ah, it takes a special sensibility to see the humor in.: LabMice.net's own miscellaneous pages offer funny stuff as well as other resources.

Check out the 'Geek Humor' section. The provide entertaining information about urban legends - the false, the true, the simply unsubstantiated - including computer and business-related. Suppose that Santa Claus could travel through your router (presuming that he's firewall-resistant) and into your data center. What would he be bringing your IT department? In this story, one IT guy asks Santa for a user zapper. Do you have a favorite IT humor link that you think we should add?

BEIJING - Alibaba's billionaire co-founder Jack Ma will announce a succession plan to hand the reins of his sprawling empire to a new generation of leaders but will remain executive chairman for the time being. Ma will announce the plan on his 54th birthday and the handover strategy will stretch over a significant period of time, the South China Morning Post (SCMP) newspaper reported citing a company spokesman.

Alibaba declined to comment but pointed toward the SCMP story when asked about Ma's plans. Ma, who co-founded Alibaba in 1999, stepped down as chief executive in 2013. He currently serves as the company's international face at top political and business events. The New York Times reported on Friday that Ma would retire from the e-commerce company on Monday as the former English teacher seeks to focus on philanthropy in education. China's third richest person with a net worth of US$36.6 billion according to Forbes magazine, Ma was quoted by the New York Times as saying his retirement was not the end of an era, but the beginning of one. While Ma's plan to gradually step back is a milestone, analysts and industry professionals said it was unlikely his involvement would change significantly. 'I don't think it means that much, frankly.

He stepped back from the CEO role about four or five years ago and very specifically made a comment about wanting the younger people to lead the company,' said Kevin Carter, founder of The Emerging Markets Internet exchange-trade fund. Ma oversees a number of charitable projects in education and environmental fields. He is a cult figure in China's internet industry and has attracted a big following among entrepreneurs and in pop culture. At events, he is often met with screaming fans.

Read more The company had a market value of about $420 billion as of Friday. Ma also controls Ant Financial, which was valued at about $150 billion after a recent fundraising round. The succession plans come at a tricky time for Chinese tech firms. Authorities have increasingly sought to regulate the industry where Alibaba and main rival Tencent Holdings Ltd are battling for consumers. Trade tensions also present a new challenge for Chinese tech firms, especially those like Alibaba which are rapidly expanding overseas. This year, regulators shot down a $1.2 billion bid for money transfer service Moneygram International by Ant Financial on national security grounds, which the company said was related to 'geopolitical' changes. Ma's decision also comes as U.S.

Police investigate an allegation of rape against Richard Liu, head of e-commerce rival JD.com, which has hammered its shares. Liu was arrested and released without charge in the U.S.

City of Minneapolis last week. Through his lawyers, he has denied any wrongdoing. Liu is chairman and chief executive at JD.com, and the incident spooked investors as the company has no clear succession plan. (Reporting by Cate Cadell and Ryan Woo in Beijing, Manas Mishra in Bengaluru; writing by Adam Jourdan; editing by Leslie Adler and Jason Neely).